Make her feel Loved

Far too many men think you can simply give your wife a kiss and provide flowers on important days to make her feel loved. More than likely if your relationship is on the rocks it is because there are problems that need to be overcome and she is feeling that you do not truly love her. A final concept to learn in how to get your wife back is learning how to make her feel loved.

Men and women are different. This is not earth-shattering news but for some reason sometimes we forget. Women are complex and honestly just wired differently from us and it is important that you learn how to relate and even talk to her in a language she understands. There are many ways to express love and it might just be that you have been showing her love but not in the way she wants.

Different Styles of Showing Love

It has been discussed many times over by numerous counselors and therapists that in the world of relationships there are five basic ways partners show love and affection towards each other.

• Words of Love – This is not only saying “I love you,” but also saying it that she understands you mean it. Other words of love include compliments about how she looks or makes you feel, appreciating her when she does things, or just letting her know she is special. Conversely negative talk or insults can be some of the worst things you can say.
• Time Together – Many times people fall into patterns of growing apart as a marriage develops. Greater responsibilities with work, children, friends, and the like tend to change our patterns. Compared to the initial amount of time you invested in your relationship this decrease of quality time can be massive. Recapturing that special one-on-one time where your spouse gets 100% of your time and attention is a valuable way to show that you love and care.
• Gifts – This is more than buying something expensive and shiny. Gifts can be special tokens or something else that adds personal meaning and thought. Taking the time to write a poem, even if it ends up corny, and giving that with a single rose is a much greater show of love than buying her that dishwasher she said she wanted.
• Actions - Doing things for others can be invaluable at times. “Out of the blue he just started helping me dry the dishes.” Showing that you care by doing for someone else is selfless, supportive, and loving.
• Touch – This is more than just a kiss or simply having sex. People enjoy and need to be touched in different ways. Some women long to be held and have their hair rubbed. Others would dearly love to have a neck rub or to just hold hands as you walk together. They are always different ways to show affection and love that she may yearn for but you haven’t given.

In some cases you might greatly appreciate one or two of these love styles and that is how you truly feel happy and loved. The same can go for your spouse. Over the years you might have developed a pattern of neglecting her true needs for love and even been frustrated when you did things she didn’t appreciate. From talking earlier you have a list of things she likes. This should you give insights about things that you do that make her feel loved.

If you still aren’t sure you can either ask her directly or relive the early phase of your relationship and explore to discover what she is receptive too. In some cases fixing a relationship is much like going back to the beginning and revisiting some steps as you look to recapture the love and passion you once shared. Think about the differences between now and then. They way you were excited to see her and couldn’t wait to have a chance to kiss her. How wonderful it was when she let you hold her hand as you spent time together not worried about work or the many other things that have come between you. When you do things that make your spouse happy just for the sake of her happiness and not yours, you are being truly selfless and showing absolute love. Conversely the more love someone feels this way will inspire them to respond in kind which will make you happy and loved.

Learning how to get your wife back is hard. There will be work. But there is also reward, love, passion, and so many other things you might have forgotten on the path life has taken. But there is hope. All of those things you did before when you fell in love can be done again.

You can get back your wife. There are steps you can follow to get her to love you again. Is it easy? No. Is it worth it? Yes.