Fixing Yourself

Let’s be honest right from the start. You are not perfect. Nobody who walks this green Earth is. Now you do not have to be perfect to get back your wife. But you should at least be trying to fix some of the problems you have. It is part of being a healthy, well-adjusted person and will pay dividends in your life on many levels.

So what are your problems? This can be a difficult topic for many men to tackle. Some are more naturally aware of their own flaws and problems. Some choose not to do anything about it with the attitude of, “If you don’t like it – deal with it. That’s just how I am.” That maybe is how you are but there is no reason you have to be that way. If you truly value your marriage and want to understand how to get back your wife you need to take an honest look at who you are compared to who you want or should be.

Introspection

After talking about issues with your spouse you should have some ideas about things she doesn’t like about you as a person. It is time to peel back the curtain and compare that along with other things people have said in life about you. Combine those together along with the things you don’t like about yourself and you have now started down the road of self-improvement.

I think men are naturally afraid of the idea of self-improvement because it sounds unmanly and there is a fear of being ridiculed by friends. Seriously? Man up! Men are not supposed to be afraid of feelings or hard work. We are men and we thrive under pressure! Embrace the opportunity to build a better, stronger, and faster you.

Decide who you want to be

This is a powerful idea. Your mind is an incredible tool that given focus can accomplish many things. It is time to sit down and starting working on your new ‘Man List’. Give it a cool name like ‘My Evolution’ or ‘What Would Brad Pitt Do?’ Then start writing down the type of person you want to be with positive, affirmative statements.

• I want to be a good husband
• I want to be a good listener
• I want to make my wife happy
• I want to have incredible sex with my wife
• I want to look like I did when I was 20
• I want to be happy

These are just a few of the ideas. Your list can be as long as you want it to be. Don’t be afraid of looking at yourself in the mirror and deciding you don’t like everything you see. Then be brave enough to step up and start making changes. After you have made your list compare it to the list of things your partner is unhappy with. Add more things to your list you can improve about yourself.

If you truly want to get back your wife then you must understand that a relationship is a matter of reciprocation. When you do things that make your spouse happy just for the sake of her happiness and not yours, you are being truly selfless and showing absolute love. Conversely the more love someone feels this way will inspire them to respond in kind. That is the foundation of a solid, long-lasting relationship.